Lying, Dishonesty and Society in General

I’m including a bit of a conversation in here because I feel that it’s extremely difficult to give a person a proper view of what is actually going on without it…

Daily people lie and think nothing of it convincing themselves that it is actually better to lie than it is to hurt someone else’s feelings. Excuses won’t work. Honestly hurting someone’s feelings, isn’t exactly a cardinal sin and since no one really knows for certain how someone is going to react to a statement until after it’s said leads me to believe that the individual lying isn’t giving anyone an honest chance. Interesting concept that some people actually believe ” I lie so that I won’t hurt someone’s feelings” What I hear being said is that ” I lie and I blame it on other’s because they might get hurt feelings over something I said”. I may or may not be quite right in this opinion but for what it is worth I think it’s just plain controlling to not open up and be oneself. If a person sincerely doesn’t wish to hurt anothers feelings then just chose to say nothing and that solves the entire “lying” issue. Excuses don’t work.

Here is a small part of a short story which I think helps give young adults the idea of the feelings that lying can bring about. Negativity results in lying for whatever reason and distrust can come about for obvious reasons. This story in particular makes the person reading it think about reasons to tell the truth and to think twice about the reasons to avoid lying.

HONESTY
“I approached the driveway slowly thinking the entire time that my folks might have worried for no reason had I mentioned I was going to Jayden’s house. Instead I had told them I was walking the dog over to the park across the road from Grandma’s house. Nervously now I increased my pace my heart started to pound with exhilaration and a bit of anxiety as I realized we were going to really do it. Jayden and I had made plans to investigate the supposedly haunted building that loomed ominously at the end of the cul-de-sac. The house had been abandoned for years and lately there had been rumours of lights flickering inside the unoccupied home. Whatever the case, Jayden was as determined as I to get inside somehow and have a look see for ourselves. Nothing had excited us more than reading Nancy Drew, Trixie Beldon and the Hardy Boys. Together we had discussed the events in those novels and realized that the novels intrigued us beyond just reading them. One day I was certain we’d open up our very own private investigation service for the normal and the paranormal.

For now though it seemed light years away as we were merely 13 years old and five years was to long to wait. Tonight we were going to start our very first investigation and I was scared. So scared in fact that I was dishonest with where I’d be heading with my own Mother. My Mom a bit of an eccentric person was not one to mess around lying with and for the first time since I’d been a little child I had broken a trust that had been long standing. This trust breaking was nothing I took light hearted even now I regretted telling the fib. I might not be able to get back the honesty in our relationship because of it and was not so sure that anything was worth destroying that relationship with my mother. While she had many quirks and seemed more than a little weird her heart held me and my brothers together through many a tough time. When our alcoholic father left our spirits were crushed, but somehow Mom managed to keep a twinkle in her eye and a smile in her heart which only served to let us all know that things were still going to be alright. Not once did she complain or seem discontent even though it was her lot in life to go through the cold Minnesota winters with blue toes, a cold nose and barely enough food on the table to get by. I suddenly felt like crying and choked back a sob as I rounded up the walkway to my best friend Jayden’s front doorstep. To my surprise, she was already dressed to go and had a flashlight in tow along with a backpack with what looked like a water bottle on the side. I didn’t have to say a word and we turned and walked back down the path I just had walked up. The sun now was settling into the earth…..(to be continued)”

I know someone who used to lie out of fear which stemmed WAY back into thier childhood..as they grew older and realized that they had created a habit in which not only caused more problems for themselves but others as well a change occurred.. But the more they tried to change, the more FEAR got in the way.. ONE day this individual got particularily mad about the whole situation and asked God to help them stop lying NO matter what…and the amazing part of this story is that they still were not able to stop the “little” lies. Then all of a sudden the things that were being lied about started to become true…In essence a not so minor miracle happened.

It happened, and each time it happened this individual thanked God with tears in their eyes..Then afterwards it became easier and easier to tell the truth. Now, to this day this person hasn’t completely been able to be honest yet telling three lies in one year is better than telling three lies in one week. It’s a considerable improvement and with God’s help success is on the way. This individual has come a long way in three years after a lifetime of fear based dishonesty.

While change is inevitable let’s attempt to make it a change for the positive! A little faith and desire can overcome a lot of life’s challenges. Honestly I think our world will be a better place if we place more stock in telling the truth.

By: Sherri Beliveau

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